The 12 kinds of guys you’ll find on Minder.

by Mozzified Contributors Zainab Khan and Zara Khurshid

Minder, a self-proclaimed “no nonsense approach to finding a great Muslim spouse,” was launched last week. Our staff at Mozzified decided to investigate. These are the kinds of guys we found:

1) Mr. Confident.

This guy already has the date, venue, and ring picked out. All he’s waiting for is your baba’s number. #slowdownbro

2) The Flirt.

Him: When should I send my parents over?
You: … I should have swiped left.

3. The Mipster.

Angles, Angles, Angles. You may see a peek of his Ray-Bans if you’re lucky.

4. The 21 year old doctor.

You: So you’re a doctor?
Him: Ya, I’m applying to med school next year.
You: *facepalm

5. The Funny Guy

“So, is it only halal if I swipe right?”

6. The Poser

He says his name is Sal, but it’s actually Salahuddin. He is looking for an “Eastern Princess,” but also a green card.

“I from amrca. I born her. Seeking full time wif wit nice smile.”

7. Mr. Pretentious

“You misspelt ur word. Didnt u say ur a writer?”

8. The guy you know in person.

Him: Oh, hey! Is that you? I saw your mom last weekend.
You: Um… you have me confused for someone else.
*delete delete delete*

9. Mr. Hairdo

So am I going to marry your hair? Where’s your face?

10. Mama’s Boy.

All mom all the time. Love that. But where do I fit into your life?

11. The Bollywood Reject.

Gelled hair, motorcycle, and a leather jacket. Looking for the heroine to his hero.

12. The Model.

Is that Tyson Beckford? Oh wait, it actually is. -_-

Zainab is the founder of Mozzified and is a graduate student at UC Berkeley’s School of Journalism. Follow her on twitter @zaynman.

Zara works in San Francisco, enjoys writing, and laughs. She majored in Psychology at UC Merced. Follow her on twitter @zaranaz89